Quoting a Stalinist era proverb"When the proletariat grovels for the bare minimum required for human survival, pay close attention, then purge them all, starve them out and crush them with an iron fist!" Russian dictator Vladimir Putin then startled everyone, continuing "since President Yanukovych does not appear to be up to the job, I will find a real despot to take his place".
In a stunning about face in policy, Putin then announced his appointment of Wisconsin Governor, Scottie "Walker" aka Walkerkovych. "Comrade Walkerkovych has a proven track record for squelching democracy and bringing the working class to its knees. Just look how he crushed the teachers and public employees in the State of Wisconski." "He was so cruel, so utterly ruthless..." a teary eyed Putin swooned, he reminded me of my little old babushka who raised me" (along with the pack of Siberian wolves).
Russia then put the pressure on Ukrainian officials to hand presidential authority over to Comrade Walkerkovych and return to the deal brokered on Feb. 21 that guaranteed a new government and mandated early presidential elections.
In other developments in the Ukraine, Nannys and wet nurses across the country reported a sudden spike in bed wetting since the arrival of Comrade Walkerkovych.
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