Thursday, July 23, 2009

Fear and Loathing in Cloquet, MN


"The Angels are coming, the Angels are coming! Hurry, hurry and lock up your daughters and bolt your doors!"

It must be sweeps week in commercial media because for the last week in Minnesota all you have heard from the commercial, conservative (I know,I know,... redundant as Hell!) media (i.e the local Fox television station and their philosophical sister-station (with the exception of Reusse), KSTP AM 1500, is that the Hells Angels are having their national rally in Cloquet, MN and the world, as we know it, is coming to an end.

Just like the cowardly GWB administration, the adolescents who host the noon talk show on AM 1500, (they are so bad I can't even tell you their names, they're like a dummied down version of that (former) drunken imbecile,Glenn Beck, if that's even possible, the heir to Rush Limbaugh's throne (i.e the hypocrite's barbiturate commode), would have you throw away the constitution and prejudge thousands of people they have never met based upon stereotypes, fear and more than likely, their shame over their little wieners.

Well after about a five-minute colloquy between some local, know-it-all jack-off, wherein the two boy-hosts of the show fall over each other agreeing with the caller that we should ignore the constitution and use admittedly unconstitutional tactics to try and keep out of this state over an estimated 1,500 motorcycle riding citizens of the United States because they are "afraid", well I had HAD ENOUGH!

I picked up my cell phone, dialed 411 and before I knew it I was screaming my opinion to some poor producer, who, when I finally took a breath, tried to slow me down: "Whoa, whoa buddy why are you yelling at me? You're not even on the air", he said. At least not yet...

I start telling the producer how I am an attorney and have represented plenty of club members over the course of my practice and how these idiot radio Jock's are being so quick to trash our constitution, at which point the producer interrupts me with the famous Ben Franklin quote ("...those that would trade liberty for security deserve neither...") and says : "Hey, I agree with you..." and the next thing I hear is "Jim in Minneapolis?"

I remember thinking to myself, stay calm stay calm...but of course my emotion's get the best of me and the tirade begins (I paraphrase):


"I just had to call in after that last conversation with a caller. I am an attorney and have represented plenty of club members over the last 20 years and, let me tell you, 98% of them were real gentlemen. You people (conservative media and political types) are so quick to proclaim your love for our Constitution and its strict construction, yet seem way too quick to give up the constitutional rights of others. This is terrible how you gladhanders in the media are jumping on the bandwagon, whipping up public hysteria over this issue. Why don't you wait until someone has done something (illegal) before judging them. When clubs like the Angels go on these events they are on their best behavior. You know with the economy the way it is, we probably should not be driving business off."

When I pause for a breath the teeny boppers spray back at me some bullshit about criminal syndicates or something to that effect to which I respond that I had little trouble, in my experience, with the bikers compared with the (criminal syndicate like) behavior of the strike and task forces. Before ending with "I am not even going to go there!" before hanging up. The little boys clap and celebrate with glee as though they actually had won the exchange.

The next caller, a man out for my own heart, opens with: "Finally you got someone on who knows what they are talking about...". The sixtyish sounding man continues with an authoritative, gravelly biker-voice how he lives or owns property out by Sturgis and deals with the Clubs like the Angels every year. He relates how bikers, club members included are people and deserved to be judged on their own actions, not grouped together by stereotypes and discriminated against because of fear. Far more eloquently than I did (or could), this man, no, this Patriot, went on to give a tour de force argument that absolutely eviscerated whatever flotsam and hyperbole that made up the little talk-show weenies ad homonym attack. To show you how stupid the hosts of this excuse for a radio show are, they did not even know or did not have the courage to admit, that they were wrong. That in fact, if it were their rights being violated, they would be crying, pissing and caterwauling all over the airwaves. Now who really are the Patriots in this situation?

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